Bob the lawyer called in regarding what parents need to do if their child is being bullied:
Dear Kathy:
This is what parents should do if their child is the victim of bullying
1. Contact the school’s teachers, principal, assistant principal, superintendent, school board members, board of trustees (if a private school). Contact should be by telephone, meetings, and written correspondence. All correspondence should be sent by certified mail, return receipt requested. (When I want to get someone’s attention, I will send the same letter by first class mail; certificate of mailing; and certified mail return, receipt requested.) each and every contact with the school officials should be followed up with correspondence. The correspondence should be fact based and very clinical in its presentation. The letter should be dated and signed. The letter should include what occurred at the meeting or in the telephone call. The time, date, day of the week, and the place of the meeting should be recited. All persons who attended the meeting should be named. Whenever a personal meeting occurs, always try to be accompanied by a witness or friend or family member or spouse. Have your own witness. Audio tape conversations at meetings and telephone conversations. Make the record. Don’t be lazy. Expect to be lied to by everyone. Obtain business cards and contact cards of everyone that you meet. Write the date and time and day of the week on the back of the card when you receive it.
2. Contact the police by letter, meeting, telephone. Follow-up every contact with a letter that recites what occurred at the meeting. Tell the police that you child is being bullied and that you are concerned for your child’s safety and welfare.
3. Consider retaining a lawyer.
4. Consider talking to a mental health counselor.
5. If things are very unsafe and dangerous, do not hesitate to remove your child from school.
6. Remember, that school officials have an affirmative responsibility to make the school safe for learning.
7. Demand to have a copy of the school’s anti-bullying policy.
8. Consider taking your child to a doctor or social worker, psychologist, psychiatrist, counselor is there is depression.
9. Contact the local prosecutor by letter, telephone, meeting. Follow-up with correspondence.
10. All correspondence is sent by certified mail, return receipt requested.
11. Photocopy everything.
12. Contact the parents of the bullies and let them know what is being done to your child. Follow up with correspondence. Contact the bullies and tell them to stop bothering your child. Follow up with a letter to the bully.
13. Contact the press, newspaper editor, media, TV news, radio news. Follow-up with correspondence.
14. Always stick to the facts. Be careful about accusing people of committing crimes. Such accusations may be qactionable as defamation. Use the words allege, alleges, alleged, alleging, or allegation when describing any acts of alleged bullying.
15. Consider obtaining an order of protection against the bully and in favor of your child from the Family Court or with the assistance of the police or prosecutors.
16. Contact the county Family Court legal staff.
17. Contact the county District Attorney.
18. Every school should have a policy that recruits everyone in the school to stop bullying.
19. The Internet is full of web sites about anti-bullying. there is some terrific information. Use the language from the sites when contacting the authorities and the officials.
20. Do not be passive.
21. Perform a comprehensive investigation and obtain names, dates, telephone numbers, e-mail addresses, cell phone numbers, all contact information regarding the bully.
22. Check all electronic devices used by your child for information and for bullying messages.
23. Consider recruiting a technical company to perform forensic analysis of cell phones and computers used by your child.
24. Information is your friend.
25. Be accurate, precise, comprehensive, correct, thorough, and exact.
26. Use critical thinking skills.
27. Don’t be lazy.
28. Don’t relax. Remain vigilant.
29. Facts win the day every time. Assume nothing.
30. Build the file.
31. Demand action.
32. Proper prior preparation prevents poor performance.
33. If the officials and authorities will not take appropriate action, then you take the action and protect your child.
34. Act on your intuition and suspicions.
35. Do not take no for an answer.
36. Do not accept that nothing can be done.
Thanks Bob!
